The gospel of Grace Jones

Where would we be without Josephine Baker, or Sister Rosetta Tharpe, or Bessie Smith, Ma Rainey, or Billie Holiday? Or Tina Turner, or Marsha P. Johnson, or so many more. They say it as if she’s…

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Would I Ever Have Cosmetic Surgery

What’s a dad to say?

My daughter and I were driving in the car the other day and the morning radio hosts were talking about the prevalence of botox. My 18 year old daughter asked whether mom would ever have do that?

My daughter knows that both my wife and I care about our appearance and have a real fear of aging. It’s actually a running joke in the family that we are always adjusting our age downward.

The truth is, we’ve both had ‘work done’. I get filler in my cheeks to compensate for their ‘hollowing out’ as I age. I also get PRP treatment for hair loss — a wicked little procedure wherein they inject your blood plasma back into your scalp through hundreds of little needles. It’s wickedly painful but works really well. My wife, she gets filler and botox every few months to avoid wrinkles. She had considered breast augmentation a few years ago but decided against it, not wanting to have to explain it to our kids and to colleagues.

We definitely own the fact that we are vain. The way we explain this vanity to our kids and to others — we take a lot of care in our mental acuity and physical health, and we take a lot of care in our physical appearance. This explains why we work out a lot and try to dress nicely. But botox, boob jobs, cosmetic surgery — this seems like a different kettle of fish.

So when my daughter asked if my wife would get botox, I kind of punted it back to her. I asked her what she thought about it. My daughter — my oldest — is a very serious kid. Places a huge focus on academics, has no interest in dating, swims and rock climbs a little to stay active. She has only recently started to care at all about the clothes she wears, and shows little concern about her appearance, or the appearance of others. That said, she is incredibly non-judgmental and full accepts that others — as in, all other members of her family — do care about these things. She can actually — cleverly — relate to the vanity of others. She will say ‘I care a lot what others think of me. I want them to see me as smart’… and she fully sees this as her form of vanity.

Back to the botox question. First, she asked me exactly what botox was and what it did. I explained it. Then she asked if there were risks. I explained what I knew of the risks and…

The gospel of Grace Jones

Would I Ever Have Cosmetic Surgery

What’s a dad to say?

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